Who would have known that the simple call for help would through a rag tag group into an adventure so bizarrely insane that they barely have time to conclude one situation before they wind up in another? and this is only the beginning.

It was a peaceful day when a certain barbarian (Lugnut) was enjoying his milky tea when a slightly bedraggled man (Paco) barged into the tavern claiming need of a fighter. Well, the barbarian was all too keen to help, of course, so he "hastily" packed his belongings for the trip. But he'd missed one of his plentiful supply of weapons which Paco slipped and fell on.

His recovery from the spill proving shaky, the barbarian noticed a dart that had been caught in the stranger's cloak. Apparently, Paco'd managed to poke himself with it. Yes, it was poisoned. Yes, he passed out.

Uncertain of what else to do, Lugnut took him to the nearest temple which promised questionable results. And, though the healing process was successful, they picked up a third member to their party: a young, loud-mouthed priest (Sparkie).

Together, the three of them started on the quest Paco had begun initially on his own: to infiltrate one temple to retrieve the stolen relic of another. After a minor debate about the morals of the situation and a refresher on the patron deity, the three went in search of the missing relic. They found guards. Mean, ugly guards. Ever the diplomat, Lugnut decided he would settle things peacefully...
Paco and Sparkie left him to it.

They met back up at the entrance of the room that held the relic. As the resident thief, Paco stepped forward but was stopped by some kind of powerful magic. A mysterious shadowed woman appeared and gave him the needed information to by pass the protective spell. They needed a virgin.

With none stepping forward, the band decided to trek back to the relic's rightful owners and let them know the situation. They met a little resistance along the way, in the form of a band of imps, led by their king. (And they thought the guards were ugly!) Paco, fed up with the whole mess, unleashed an unusual spell to destroy the king.
This brought up questions with his companions as to the nature of this unusual spell and how it works. Paco wasn't too keen on explaining the nature of "Bent Magic", but Sparkie already understood.

And in some unknown area, some woman was growing impatient...

They reached the temple and explained the situation to the head priestess who had just the solution. It seemed their temple had a token virgin, a young woman (Allariella... Allura) dressed in very little clothing, apparently for just such an occasion. So, after an unusual exchange between the head priestess and Paco, the party left for the temple... just not quite how they'd expected.

Suddenly finding themselves in front of the target temple, with only some mysterious words and a pair of eyes among the flora as an explanation, they made another attempt at retrieving the relic. Without the resistance of guards (they'd made "an agreement"), they easily made it to the relic room. But were stopped by the temple's Deputy HeadPriestess and her personal guards. Of course, they didn't realized they would be facing a priest of the war god Hityu. Then Lugnut took his turn, moving the Deputy Headpriestess out of the way.

Relic safely in.. cloak, the band finally hits the road again. They take a break for the night, giving Allura and Lugnut a change to get to know each other, and the other two who were already fast asleep. (Yes, a brief chracter review break, sort of). But their brief respite was shattered by the arrival of dun dun dun an Evil Duck. And a carniverous one at that.
How will the little band handle this new "threat"?